If you can’t boil your book down to two sentences then it isn’t ready.
This is true. It also follows that if you can’t boil your book down to two sentences then you can’t write the hook at the top of your query/cover letter. But, what goes into this all important mini-paragraph?
Two words: Dramatic Conflict
Dramatic Conflict is basically this pattern everytime: Somebody wants something, but there’s something big in the way. So he’ll have to give it all he’s got to even have a shot at it. Will he win or lose?
Here’s some ridiculous, made-up examples:
John loves Martha. The only problem is–Martha’s marrying someone else in two weeks and doesn’t even know he’s alive. Can John get her to fall in love with him in time or will he lose her forever?
Chewing bones is the highlight of Bob Dog’s day, but his owner has gone vegetarian and put Bob on the diet. How will Bob persuade his owner to forgo the tofu and bring back the pork shoulder?
Shelly Sheep has gorgeous wool and a nasty shearing phobia. Every time the clippers turn on, she throws up all over herself and shorts out the clippers. If she can’t get it together soon, she’ll end up at the butcher’s instead. What will she do?
If you follow this pattern and can sum up your book in this way, then your conflict is tight and your cover letters/queries will be compelling enough to get your story read with interest.
But not all children’s books are about conflict!!! True. Most of mine are that way too. But, in my experience, the best hooks present the material as a solution to conflict outside the book. A child’s desire to explore versus his the difficulty of the material…or his need to know versus his age-appropriate disinterest…of his endless curiosity versus the limited availability of books on the subject.
More ridiculous, made-up examples:
ALPHA MANNERS, a 400-word picture book, uses ironic gross-out comedy and ridiculous rhymes to keep the young reader engaged as he learns his ABC’s and improves his interpersonal behavior skills.
The picture book HAIKU MAMBO leads the young reader into the fascinating world of Italian-Japanese nature dance. With rollicking rhythm and deep meditative imagery, young readers will be simultaneously entertained and enlightened by this cross cultural passport.
RECYCLED JOE is a picture book that leads the young reader through the steps of recycling–not just what and where to recycle, but follows the journey of one particular coffee cup through the recycling plant as he is reprocessed into the very book the child is holding. RECYCLED JOE not only reinforces the need to recycle, but helps the reader see each piece of recyclable trash (and, metaphorically, the people around him) not in terms of what it used to be, but what it can now become.
HA! Those crack me up.
In summary, the best teasers promise a great ride through fictional obstacles for a fictional character OR an engaging leg up on real world obstacles.
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