I told myself I wasn’t going to grow squash this year.  I have chronicled my squash woes in previous posts, including here, wherein I sustained a SBRI.

Every time I try to grow squash I end up sacrificing a gargantuan amount of my limited garden space only to end up with a lot of rotten squash, yellowing plants, and basically a squash bug/beetle/borer smorgasbord.  I might as well put a ‘kick me’ sign on my back.

But of course I’ve done it again.  And to add to what is certain to be my ultimate humiliation, I’ve erected a monstrosity of bamboo and tulle over my squash bed in a vain attempt to keep the bugs out.  It resembles a miniature wedding tent, post-tornadic event, and I’m sure the squash pests are having a big belly-laugh over it.  Goodness knows what the neighbors are thinking:

(shakes head)  “What is that thing?”

(scratches chin) “Switched if I know.  Some sort of play tent for her eighteen children?”

(purses lips)  “Naw, can’t be.  It’s too low to the ground.”

(walks away in dismay)  “Well, whatever it is, it sure is ugly, bless her heart.”

They are NOT getting any squash.

Hand pollination tutorial here.