Apart from my Finished Room Over the Garage (FROG), my attic covers my entire house. It’s a little house, but that’s still a lot of attic! Yesterday it was stuffed to the gills with CRAPOLA. Now, look at it! (Pictured above.)
Look again from the other direction!
Oooo, it’s so pretty! And the box springs are only there because we ran out of energy. We’ll get them out tomorrow.
How to Have an Empty Attic Like Ivory
1. Have a super-mouse infestation from leaving an open bag of field corn in the garage.
2. Conquer said super-mice.
3. Find rat-turds when you go up to retrieve the Christmas Tree.
4. Buy new tree and refuse to go in attic for six months.
5. Make appointment to have a garage sale with neighbor because she’s an expert and the very idea of selling or bartering makes you want to drink…heavily.
6. On a 102 degree day, unload entire contents of attic. (The temperature is very important!)
7. Shop vac the rat-turds and admire the empty beauty of it all. Relax till lunch. Have a taco.
8. Sort the crap into five piles: Stays Downstairs, Un-Recyclable Garbage, Recyclable Garbage, Garage Sale, Returning to Attic….remembering the temperature up there.
9. Keep only those treasures that are worth a trip back into a bazillion-degree attic.
10. Restock attic, garage sale everything else.
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