FLOPS

Misadventures in No ‘Poo

by Daisy Body Care Products

Ever since I stopped using shampoo, I’ve tried several different approaches to having presentable hair: apple cider vinegar rinses, brushing it out with a natural bristle brush, and essential oil-baking soda scrubs. After giving up on baking soda after hearing it was too harsh for hair, I’ve relied on hot water and vinegar rinses almost […]

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How NOT To Make Comfrey Fertilizer

by Daisy DIY

This post originally had a different title. In the interest of full disclosure which is our informal policy here, after I actually made the fertilizer, I had to add the NOT. It all began well. I cut a lot of comfrey and packed it into a five-gallon bucket. I left it, covered in plastic, for […]

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Freezer Cooking Fail: Waffles

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

  This was my first freezer cooking attempt with my good friend Missy.  We made waffles all day.  There was really nothing wrong with the recipe.  It’s just that we both have *sensory* kids.  Her’s are anti-crispy when it comes to waffles and most anything else.  Mine are anti-wimpy.  so her kids ate the dickens […]

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We Got the Moles

by Daisy FLOPS

I don’t like this. In case you can’t tell, what you see in the photo is a hole where a nice fat head of radicchio once grew. All that’s left is a splay of rootless outer leaves left to desiccate around the hole.  A mole hole. Short of putting hardware cloth beneath the entire garden […]

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Freezer Cooking Win…and Fail: Baked Bacon

by Ivory Soap Breakfast

  Those biscuits were awesome, btw, but I will get to those in another post.  Right now we need to talk PIG. My children really latched onto that “World Bacon Shortage” story back in September.  I think it’s a self-fulfilling prophesy, as they are eating bacon like “shortage” meant “extinction.” My husband used to bar tend at […]

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FLOP: Homemade Bake Mix and Whop Biscuits

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

The picture says it all.   It was ALL BAD, y’all. I think my first mistake was the WHITE WHOLE WHEAT. I had the same problem with the homemade pizza crust (the yeasty version, not the bake mix-biscuity version that never fools anyone.)  My husband is an old pizza driver.  We aren’t afraid AT ALL […]

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Tomato Suckers And How NOT To Make A Video

by Daisy Beginner Gardens

Most mainstream advice on tomato care includes the recommendation to prune out tomato suckers.  Suckers are those little leaf growths (little in the beginning, anyway–they can get huge) in the axil of the tomato plant. The axil is the name for the joint where the branch meets the stem. Here’s a pic of a tomato […]

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Corn Flake Injury

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

This is perhaps the most vicious homemaking injury I’ve ever received.  It’s like a paper cut on steroids.  This picture was taken after two days and lots of antibiotic ointment.  It actually goes across three fingers, but it was hard to get the light to go in between my middle and ring finger. So how […]

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Kraut Catastrophe: A Tale of Woe Part II

by Daisy FLOPS

When we last left this saga, I had finally unstuck the lid from Ivory’s Picklemeister.  It was a great feeling. I was so psyched to get the kraut started.  I layered it in the crock with salt, added the inoculant from Ivory’s pickles and enough water to cover, put the lids on, the glass pusher […]

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Kraut Catastrophe: A Tale of Woe Part I

by Daisy FLOPS

As you all know, everything I do always turns out perfectly. What’s that choking sound? Ah, you’ve read our flops. Well, as long as we’re letting it all hang out, you might as well know what happened when I, inspired by Ivory’s fantabulous experiences making naturally fermented pickles, decided to devote my entire crop of […]

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Curb Robbing Confidential

by Daisy FLOPS

I saw one of my neighbors filling bags with mulched leaves and grass a couple of days ago as I was driving by.  He had a riding mower with a collection container in the back, and he was stacking the bags in an orderly fashion next to the curb.  They looked so good I made […]

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Floor Fail

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

Here’s a little bedtime story for you lovely readers: Once upon a time, a beautiful princess named Ivory got a wild hair to put in her own laminate floors.  (After all Princess TL did it ten years ago, so how hard could it be?)  She borrowed a chop saw and bought an inordinate amount of […]

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Window Fail

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

Good news!  I got my window fixed.  See that bottom right pane?  It was busted out with a plastic mini-rocket.  Good thing I called my handyman to replace it, huh?  It would have looked SO TACKY otherwise. Unfortunately, less than a month after it was repaired, my youngest killed another pane with a marble and […]

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Homemade Hideous Garden

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

Isn’t that beautiful?  Corn, beans, tomatoes, watermelon…  It’s my neighbors’.  Which makes this even more shameful: Hideous Garden 101 Step 1:  Buy goats and chickens. Step 2:  Have only one fence dividing your backyard. Step 3:  Have husband who hates poo (communist) and likes grilling with friends. Step 4:  Move animals to far side of […]

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And the Squash Wore White

by Daisy FLOPS

I told myself I wasn’t going to grow squash this year.  I have chronicled my squash woes in previous posts, including here, wherein I sustained a SBRI. Every time I try to grow squash I end up sacrificing a gargantuan amount of my limited garden space only to end up with a lot of rotten […]

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That’s a lot of Jute, Ivory

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

What on earth was a I making?  Three kids, no brain cells.  Any ideas?

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Not-Soy Milk

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

This is Ivory’s soymilk maker.  She got it for her b-day from her very understanding parents (a physicist and accountant who poured years of enrichment, travel, and 16 semesters of college/grad school into a child that currently takes great joy in goat poop and regularly twists her ankles throwing chickens.)  Good folks, supporting their aberrant […]

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Watermelon Moment

by Daisy FLOPS

A moment is all it takes to consume this tasty fruit.  Lemme show you: Oh, tiny. So tiny. What went wrong? I’ve never grown a watermelon before. Any advice for next year?

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Making Homemade Tabasco Sauce

by Daisy Flavorings & Condiments

OR—How To Pepper-Gas Your Entire House So. I got ready for a normal post–here are the ingredients, here it is cooking, here’s the finished product, etc. I took the ingredient photo: Put the ingredients on to simmer for a few minutes. And went outside for a second. Which turned into several minutes. When I walked […]

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Super-Mouse

by Ivory Soap FLOPS

We don’t use the R-word.  It’s a super-mouse.  Or now super-mice.  And it’s all my fault.  Three guesses what’s in those well-sealed buckets and coolers. Something that was in a paper bag that I wondered how all the grains were ‘jumping’ out into the scrap wood stack! (Has to be the kids…) Remember this post?  […]

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