OR—How To Pepper-Gas Your Entire House
I got ready for a normal post–here are the ingredients, here it is cooking, here’s the finished product, etc.
I took the ingredient photo:
Put the ingredients on to simmer for a few minutes.
And went outside for a second.
Which turned into several minutes.
When I walked back in the door after, oh, half an hour, I pepper-gassed myself.
I gasped, coughed, and fled, choking, windpipe searing.
Then, I took a big breath and had to go back inside, remove the burning peppers from the stove . . .
. . . and evacuate my family, sleeping in on a lazy Saturday morning.
We were coughing, sneezing and choking by the time we got the windows open and the fans turned on, standing in the yard, stranded. Even the dog was coughing.
So, with one small caveat, here’s the recipe. Do as I say, not as I did.
Homemade Tabasco Sauce
1/3 cup tabasco peppers
1 cup vinegar, your choice, white, cider, wine
2 garlic cloves
1 tsp. salt
Simmer the peppers in the vinegar and salt, BRIEFLY, watching carefully, in a well-ventilated area.
Do not go out and start to leaf blow the driveway.
Remove from heat, cover and cool.
Add crushed garlic and puree in a blender or food processor until smooth. Don’t stick your nose right in there and breathe deeply. Please, for the love of your mucous membranes.
Store in the refrigerator.